14th February 2010 – and once again the world got filled with the buzz for valentines – lovers holding hands, hearts decorating most shops, people getting mystery gifts, flowers shops stocking up on roses and aspirins (for themselves) as they braced themselves for the onslaught of people for what was probably the busiest (and most profitable) day of the year for them!
And once again, I found myself dateless – or without a significant other to get all lovey dovey with. Hmmm…..its all so easy to dismiss this day as commercialised rubbish or ignore the fact that this day exists but the bottom line lies that on this day where romance is so prominent – the feeling that lingers amongst most singletons is simply crap!!
What makes it so gloomy is coz this day is about love….and the greatest need for the human heart is the need for love – to give out love and what it desperately desires is to receive love.
Love. What does it mean really? That word has been so used and abused that people dont even know what it means anymore. I guess thats the problem with the english language, we have too few words that mean far too many things. The Ancient Greeks had four distinct words for love and broke it down:
1. Agape: meaning unconditional love. Agape is the word used in 1 Corinthians 13 which is known as the “love chapter” of the Bible. Many have thought that this word represents divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, volitional, and thoughtful love.
2. Eros: Now here is a word we are all too familiar with. The word erotic is derived from it (really, need I go on?). Also known as marital love.
3. Philia: meaning friendship in modern Greek. In ancient texts, philos denoted a general type of love, used for love between family, between friends, a desire or enjoyment of an activity, as well as between lovers.
4.Storge: meaning “affection” in ancient and modern Greek. It is natural affection, like that felt by parents for offspring.
C.S. Lewis “The Four Loves” talks about these four types of love : Charity, Eros, Friendship and Affection.
And as I’m looking at that list above, i’m grinning…..coz at this point in time i realise that 3 outta 4 isnt that bad. And though its a not-so-nice feeling being a singleton as I see so many of my peers are tying the knot or getting into relationships.
I need to remind myself that its an even yuckier feeling getting out of relationships that turn sour and I dont really need to get desperate, and that I do indeed have love in my life but just not in the form of mr.right at the moment!
So am gonna end this one with a quote from the movie Love Actually where Hugh Grant’s character makes this opening statement -“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don’t see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there – fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge – they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaking suspicion… love actually is all around. “